Playing Entrepreneur With Your Little Online Shop? My Sister Laughed At Christmas. Everyone Joined In. I Kept Eating Quietly.
When my sister mocked me for playing entrepreneur with your little online shop, I stayed quiet while everyone laughed, unaware that something playing in the background was about to make the room very uncomfortable.
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The words playing entrepreneur with your little online shop captured exactly what my family thought of me. I arrived at my parents’ house for Christmas dinner carrying a simple $20 grocery-store fruit basket. At almost the same moment, my sister Rebecca pulled up in her leased BMW with a trunk filled with elaborately wrapped presents that probably cost more than my monthly grocery budget. She looked at my modest contribution and immediately commented that I was still “keeping it simple.” I smiled without responding. Rebecca had always been the golden child: married to a corporate lawyer, living in a house with a three-car garage, and serving as president of her neighborhood HOA. I was the family’s question mark.
Inside, the house smelled of roasted turkey and my aunt’s famous sweet potato casserole. Aunts, uncles, cousins, my brother Marcus, and his wife Jennifer had already gathered. Conversation actually stopped when I entered. Mom greeted me as though she were mildly surprised I’d bothered to come and wondered aloud whether my “projects” might have kept me busy. Then Uncle Richard, already several drinks into the evening, asked whether I was still doing that “internet thing.” I quietly told him it was e-commerce. He compared it to a neighbor earning a few hundred dollars selling crafts and called it a good hobby.
I sat down with a glass of wine while everyone returned to discussing Rebecca. She had recently appeared in a local magazine as one of its 40-under-40 business professionals and proudly showed everyone the photograph on her phone. Dad beamed and called a cover feature “real success.” Then Aunt Linda turned toward me and asked whether I was still living in my little downtown apartment. When I said yes, she sympathetically patted my hand and observed that not everyone needed a big house—especially someone with a small income.
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Dinner began at six.
I was seated at the far end of the extended table between my teenage cousin, who spent the meal looking at his phone, and Uncle Richard, who had moved on to bourbon.
Mom offered me turkey while making another comment about money being tight when you’re self-employed.
Across the table, Rebecca occupied the place of honor beside Dad and described her upcoming vacation to an exclusive resort. Dad praised her for working hard, climbing the corporate ladder, and investing wisely.
Then Marcus brought me into the conversation.
He reminded everyone about the time I’d left my marketing job to pursue “entrepreneurship,” complete with air quotes.
Mom remembered how worried she’d been when I walked away from a stable job with benefits.
Rebecca asked how long my online-shop experiment had been going.
“Six,” I corrected her.
Six years.
Rebecca responded by suggesting it might finally be time for me to return to a real career. She even offered to ask her husband Douglas whether his law firm had any administrative positions available.
Douglas agreed to help.
Then he told me everyone had to be realistic about their limitations.
I took a sip of water and remained silent.
The rest of dinner became a parade of family accomplishments. Marcus had another promotion. Jennifer had joined the school board. My cousin made the dean’s list.
Every few minutes, someone looked toward me with an expression they probably considered kindness.
To me, it looked like pity.
They believed I had spent six years pursuing something that wasn’t working. They believed the apartment, modest lifestyle, and simple Christmas gift proved that I was struggling.
And no one seemed particularly interested in asking what my business actually was.
So while my family continued treating me as though I were playing entrepreneur with your little online shop, I kept eating quietly—and the television continued playing unnoticed in the background.
